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BULLYING STOPS HERE
'how to STOP bullies'
‘If someone treats you
just remember that
there is something
wrong with them not
bullies are nasty
to stop them bothering you
you are getting bullied
you are a bully
about bullying is short and simple because it’s not that complicated once you
understand what’s actually happening and I believe it can help clear up the
often held misconception that bullies are some sort of powerful being that
command fear and respect. This outdated viewpoint is in fact far from the real
truth as you will soon find out.
The key is
having a simple understanding of how the human mind works and applying that
knowledge to bullying. Add to this a couple of methods, one that you can use to
change the way that you automatically think and feel and the other that you can
use to deal with the attentions of a bully and it all becomes clear and
First we will
look at ‘High Vibrational Thinking’;
this concept will make it easier for you to understand exactly what is going on
in your own mind. Absorption of the principles of HVT will automatically create
a shift in your perspective and this is the first step in empowering you to be
able to alter your thinking.
Then we will
look at your ‘inner resistance’ and why
it is the major barrier to your happiness that you have to contend with every
day of your life.
followed by applying this knowledge to bullying which will shed a new powerful
light on how it works giving you in the process an empowered perspective showing
you why bullies are in fact weak not strong people.
is followed by ‘The Notebook Method’,
which is a simple technique to enable you to begin altering your thinking
process and release your ‘inner resistance’, which will stop you getting
bullied or if you are a bully will stop you being a bully.
Once you have
read this book and started following ‘The Notebook Method’ you will immediately
start to see results and every aspect of you life will begin to improve.
HVT (High Vibrational Thinking)
Vibrational Thinking) is a new and simple way to look at our world, first you
need to understand that we live in a world of energy.
that you can see is not really solid at all, it is made up from atoms, which
are tiny particles that consist of a nucleus in the centre with electrons and
protons whizzing around the nucleus.
are buzzing and vibrating.
made from atoms including us, concrete walls, houses, animals, cars, trees,
plants, food, clothes you name it and if you looked at it closely enough (under
a powerful microscope) you will find it is made from atoms. So we are not as
solid as we think and neither is everything else that we observe in our world.
It is actually made from energy and like all forms of energy everything is
us that in our world the fastest vibrating energy that we know is LOVE
and the slowest vibrating energy that we know is FEAR.
When we feel
good our energy field vibrates at a fast rate, when we feel bad our energy
field vibrates at a slow rate. So the closer that our energy field vibrates to
the vibration of LOVE the happier we feel and the faster we are
vibrating. The closer our energy field vibrates to the energy of FEAR
the unhappier we feel and the slower we are vibrating.
This is why we
say we are ‘buzzing’ or ‘high’ when we feel good and also why we
say we are ‘down in the dumps’ or ‘flat as a pancake’ when we
feel bad, we are simply talking about our energy vibration.
and emotions that make us feel good like laughing, honesty, joy, peace, and
success are high vibrational, they lift up our vibration, so that’s why we feel
happy when our mind is filled with these things.
feelings and emotions that make us feel unhappy like anger, jealousy, hate,
fear and greed are low vibrational, they drag down our vibration, so that’s why
we feel unhappy when our mind is filled with these things.
So that’s easy
enough to understand the higher our energy field is vibrating the better we
feel and the easier our life will be because all the low vibrational negative
stuff exists in the lower vibrations.
Of course everyday is a roller coaster
ride up and down the energy spectrum, as we go about our daily life
experiencing many positive and negative events and situations. The trick is to
be less emotionally entangled in the low vibrational stuff and it will drag you
down less, it will have a less damaging affect if you don’t buy into it.
Your ‘inner resistance’ is the negative
energy that you carry within.
Everybody has this and it is created
mainly in the first five or six years of our lives. During this very sensitive
and formative time period we are operating similar to a computer when it is
downloading data. Everything that we experience and are taught we readily
absorb and download and this information is not always of a positive nature.
The main source of our early years
information downloading is our parents, close family and immediate environment.
Our early experiences are accepted without question, as we soak up whatever is
going on around us and accept that this is how the world works. We believe what
we see and hear and from this exposure to data we begin forming our opinions
and beliefs, opinions and beliefs that will affect the rest of our lives.
The down side is that we are often
exposed to negative energy, which plays out in the dramas that we witness
taking place. Anger, hate, fear, frustration, worry, stress, violence, greed,
anxiety, selfishness, envy, suffering and pain of all kinds are the energies
that we see and can pick up through the everyday experiences that we are
As well as experiencing this type of
energy in our everyday environment we are also subject to TV programmes,
computer games, the media and DVD’s churning out negative energy by the
boatload in the name of entertainment.
All of the negative energies that we
experience contribute to forming what I call our ‘inner resistance’, an accumulation of negative energy that
becomes lodged within our energy field.
At the age of around six-years old we
more or less stop the intense downloading and whatever we have downloaded up
until that point, we generally carry for the rest of our lives. At this point
it has become well and truly entrenched within our mind. This ‘inner resistance’ is like a ball of
slow vibrating negative energy that infects and drags down our general vibration.
Pulling us down to a more negative frequency range, than we would naturally
exist at. A frequency range that ultimately we become used to and accept as
where we belong.
A person that has experienced a very
positive energy upbringing, which would be loving caring parents, few family
arguments, very little exposure to negative energy from the TV, DVD’s, the
media and computer games would only have a moderate amount of ‘inner resistance’ or negative energy
lodged within their energy field.
A person subject to lots of negative
energy such as heated family arguments, money problems, maybe a messy divorce,
family feelings of frustration, bullying, stress, worry, greed, hatred,
negative gossiping and fear could end up with a lot of negative energy lodged
within their energy field creating a powerful force of ‘inner resistance’.
This ‘inner resistance’ exerts a massive influence over us and can in
some cases manifest in dysfunctional behaviour, depression or even
psychological and physical illness. If we have a very strong dose of ‘inner resistance’ most of our days
can be spent under its influence feeling down, worried about whatever and in
general not so good about life. It can take over our mind flooding us with a
constant barrage of negative thoughts and feelings.
Fortunately most people don’t have that
strong a presence of ‘inner resistance’
that it takes over your life completely but you will have enough of it to
ensure that you will be under its influence at sometime everyday of your life.
It won’t normally completely dominate your thoughts and feelings but it will
frequently show its presence. Even when you are not aware of it you may be
feeling slightly tense just under the surface, this is your ‘inner resistance’
that you are sensing. Its brooding presence is never far away from your
It also springs to life many times
during your day when you react to whatever is happening in a negative way.
Maybe you lose your keys and get frustrated and angry because you
can’t find them. Your negative response (the instinctive flood of thoughts and
feelings) is your ‘inner resistance’
coming to life and the negative feelings you experience surging through your
mind and body will top up its battery.
This is how it stays strong within you,
by topping up its battery everyday through the negative thoughts, feelings and
emotions that it ignites within you. You get angry you recharge its battery,
you worry, feel stressed, feel jealous, feel upset, feel depressed, feel
irritated, feel envious, feel guilty, feel annoyed or feel disillusioned, you
are topping up its battery. You are allowing it to live through you and gain
This goes on every day without you
realising it and what you are doing is keeping your ‘inner resistance’ strong and powerful within you. Picture it as a
ball of negative energy that lives within you that needs charging up every day,
just like your mobile phone. The trick is stop reacting and you stop recharging
it, then it will slowly disappear.
And because it is heavy slow vibrating
energy it is holding your vibration down making your life more difficult in the
process. It acts like a heavy weight and pulls down your overall energy
So the more powerful your ‘inner resistance’
is, the heavier it is and the more it will drag you down. The further down you
are the more problems you will have in your life because as we learned through
high vibrational thinking the further down in vibration that you go the more
negative energy you will be subject to and this is when some people fall into
negative behaviour patterns such as bullying.
Developing ‘inner resistance’ is nobody’s fault and it’s something that we
all do. Everybody experiences many different levels of negative energy as we
grow up. And because we are all different we all respond to it in different
ways. One person may develop a powerful and strong ‘inner resistance’ and
another person may hardly be bothered by the same amount of early year’s
exposure to negative energy. It depends on many things personality,
temperament, sensitivity, character etc.
In the world as it is today the
experience of negative energy is very much a part of life and impossible to
avoid. This makes ‘inner resistance’
part of everybody’s life and an influential factor in everything that we do. It
has an affect on our relationships, health, financial position, work, the level
of success we can achieve and even how happy our life will be.
It reaches into every area of our lives
and has a damaging affect, to change things for the better you must weaken and
get rid of the ‘inner resistance’
you hold within. This will allow your vibration to rise into the higher
vibrations where less negative energy exists and this is the key to
understanding why some people bully and how to stop it happening to you.
bullies are nasty
From an energy point of view it’s easy to
understand why a bully behaves in a hurtful way to other people, it’s because their
energy field is often vibrating at a slow rate due to having a lot of inner
This puts them most of the time in the
lower negative vibrations where it really doesn’t feel very nice, they often
feel afraid, unhappy, miserable, uneasy, worthless, not as good as other people
and even depressed. It could be because they are having or have had a difficult
unhappy childhood or are facing other problems in their life. Or maybe they
live where lots of people around them are bullies and they have been bullied a
Whatever the reason they have a desperate need
to find some relief from the uncomfortable negative thoughts and feelings that
plague their mind and this drives some to fall into a behaviour pattern that is
unfortunately focused on dragging down someone else’s energy vibration. They
call someone a nasty name; the person attacked feels hurt and upset so they
experience a drop in their vibration and this makes them feel unhappy. The
bully feels powerful and strong for a brief moment and this gives them a
temporary boost up in vibration and this makes them feel happy.
bully is basically stealing your happiness without any concern for how it makes
The attack on somebody causes the bully to momentarily
engage misguided thoughts and feelings of superiority, strength and power and
this is what gives them a quick boost up the vibrations and makes them feel
better. They may even engage in laughter and glee which helps boost them up even
further as they inflict the suffering, which confirms again that they don’t
understand how much this hurts the victim. Bullies can only think of themselves
and what they want, they have little understanding of how their victim feels.
After a short while the quick boost wears
off and their constant habitual negative thoughts and feelings return (their
inner resistance takes over again). This drags their vibration back down to its
‘normal’ lower level and then it’s back to feeling not so good. This is when
the automatic dysfunctional behaviour cycle kicks in again and they are on
alert ready to react when the next opportunity to bully somebody presents
From a HVT point of view they are playing a
never ending game of snakes and ladders, up one minute and down the next.
It’s really simple, help the bully get rid
of their inner resistance, which is behind all of their negative thoughts and
feelings and their vibration will rise naturally. The rise will be permanent
and they will no longer automatically behave in this negative way, they will
stop bullying because they will not need to do this to feel better.
They will no longer need to keep boosting their
vibration up. If they don’t do something to release their inner resistance they
will be stuck in this relentless loop of misery.
It’s not relevant what form the bullying
takes or the reason they use to attack the person because boosting up their
vibration is the only objective. Calling someone names, sending a nasty text
message, physical violence, homophobic bullying, racist bullying, cyber
bullying or whatever is all about achieving the same result, giving the bully a
temporary boost in vibration. They have found this makes them feel better and
become locked into this dysfunctional cycle of behaviour.
They may single out the victim because they
have something they don’t (lots of money, happy family life, doing well at
school, new job etc) or are different to them in some way (different hair
colour, skin colour, big ears, overweight etc) but this is just so they can use
that as an excuse to poke fun or be nasty, which will get them what they really
want. The bully doesn’t necessarily hate or dislike the person or people that
they attack they are just using them. The only person they really don’t like is
themselves and the motivation is always the same, to make themselves feel
If they can cajole or encourage others to
join in and also laugh and poke fun at the victim they feel even better, this
gives them a bigger boost up because in a twisted way this makes them feel
supported, admired, approved and justified in what they are doing.
This daily routine of making other people
unhappy to get a brief moment of happiness is how it works because any relief they
can get from their negative thoughts and feelings feels better to them.
They are locked into a repetitive behaviour
cycle. Most bullies have no idea they are bullies they are simply so unhappy
most of the time because of the constant strong presence of their inner resistance
that they crave relief and this has driven them to act in a bullying way.
In the bully’s case this behaviour pattern
was probably locked into place because they may well have suffered getting
bullied themselves or observed bullying or it could be that they have just subconsciously
fallen into this method to make themselves feel better but it’s the same old
answer, it doesn’t matter how they got like this, get rid of their inner
resistance and they will stop bullying, they will be cured.
Bullying is a negative behavioural manifestation
caused by their inner resistance holding them down in vibration; it is
happening because they desperately want relief from their never ending negative
state of mind. Bullying will be more prevalent in environments or
neighbourhoods that are in general more negative. So you will see more bullying
taking place in the inner cities than out in the countryside because the inner
cities are in general lower in vibration.
need to be pitied rather than feared because they are manipulated, weak and unhappy, not strong and powerful.
They are not strong enough to ignore and
control their inner resistance and this causes them to seek relief by hurting others.
Many other people feel the same when plagued by their inner resistance but are
strong enough and caring enough to put up with it without feeling the need to
hurt other people so they can feel better. Bullies are not strong enough to do
this and they are too emotionally immature to care or understand how their
horrible, unfeeling words and actions cause terrible pain to others.
is a weakness, carried out by a weak troubled person.
They are being overpowered and used by their
inner resistance, which causes them to behave in this negative way and they more
than likely have no idea what’s going on. The majority of the time they are sad,
unhappy people too mentally weak to resist the urge to lash out at another to
ease their pain.
Don’t react to a bully’s taunts and they
will feel less of a boost in vibration, so the bully will soon leave you alone.
The more you react the bigger the boost up for them, so the more likely they
will feel drawn to bully you again. This is why some people get bullied all of
the time because the bullies see that they always react, they openly show that
they feel hurt, upset, annoyed etc and this makes them more of a target.
When you react and ‘feel’ really hurt over a period of time there is a danger that you
could slip into a victim mentality and this means you end up almost expecting
to get bullied, you really fear it and this can put you in a nervous, scared, lonely,
apprehensive mindset that shows in all of your actions.
You can end up feeling isolated and
vulnerable, which could generate even more negative thinking and feeling and at
worst over time lead to depression, anxiety, self-harming, drug problems etc.
This spiral downwards into the lower vibrations also means you are more than
likely going to stand out to bullies and attract them. This can even make you a
target for others who may not normally bully but are encouraged by the bully and
you could then suffer collective bullying.
don’t feel bad if you get bullied, remember the bully is the one that there is
something wrong with not you. And nearly everyone has suffered from bullying at
sometime in their lives.
Bullying is an automatic response pattern,
a symptom of having a strong and powerful inner resistance. When other people
join in and support the bully they are showing their fear, fear that they might
too get bullied. They think if I do it as well the bully will leave me alone
but what they are really showing is their weakness and lack of strength.
A strong person would never bully someone
A bullies words and actions
can only hurt you if you ‘feel’
hurt. This is what they are trying to do, make you ‘feel’ hurt. If you think to yourself ‘I know the bully is the weak
person with the problem and I will not let them make me ‘feel’ hurt’, then they can’t hurt you. It’s the ‘feeling’ hurt that they need you to
experience for them to get the boost in vibration. They want to give you their
bad feelings so don’t play their game.
If you refuse to ‘feel’ hurt they get nothing from you
and they will soon stop attacking you because it won’t be working for them. It
only works for them if you allow the feelings of hurt to surge through you. In
fact if you can master not reacting this will make them feel worse and they
will after a few attempts steer well clear of you. You know they are the one
with the real problems so let them keep it and train yourself not to react. Show
your inner strength by ignoring their attempts to goad you.
When you really ‘feel hurt’ it feels as if they are
sucking the energy out of you and inhaling it into them. They are drawing the
life force out of you and this leaves you feeling terrible and down. You must
stop them doing this and you do it by training yourself not to ‘feelhurt’. This will really turn the tables and hurt them this is how
you pay bullies back by not reacting.
A good way to teach
yourself not to ‘feel hurt’ and
ignore bullies is the ‘magic mirror’ exercise and it’s very easy to do.
Just imagine a big mirror
between you and the bully and when the bully says nasty things to you, texts
you or makes negative comments on facebook about you imagine the nasty words
bouncing off the mirror and shooting back at the bully. Really picture this and
you will see the bully’s face horrified when their negative energy comes back
The mirror can protect you
from them no matter how they are trying to attack you whether you know them or
not and remember the more you stay calm and don’t react the worse it is for them.
If you do get attacked take deep breaths and allow this to calm you down then
use the magic mirror to fire the negativity back to them. Don’t give them the
satisfaction of replying verbally or on text etc because this just means you
have engaged the negativity. Just hold your inner peace, smile and let the
mirror bounce the negativity back to them. This works very well just practice
it and see you will be amazed at their reaction.
How to stop bullies bothering you
yourself to consistently think in a more high vibrational way about yourself,
other people and the world around you is how you break down and release your
‘inner resistance’. And releasing your inner resistance is how you can once and
for all stop bullies from bothering you.
must become non-resistant to whatever negative energy is circulating in your
reality. Allow the daily negative events and niggles to unfold while holding
your inner peace. Then you will not be recharging your inner resistance and it
will in time fizzle away, this will allow you to rise in vibration and
everything in your life will dramatically improve including getting bullied.
yourself not to react to the attentions of a bully using the magic mirror is a
great way to do this and I will also show you another excellent and simple
method to deal with all the other negative stuff that happens everyday in our
lives and it’s called the notebook method.
‘The Notebook Method’
Get yourself a
small notebook and write down every time that you notice yourself feeling
negative (angry, frustrated, worried, tense, scared, depressed, anxious,
jealous, envious, hateful, hurt, upset, irritated, annoyed, depressed, unhappy
etc). Have your notebook with you at all times and keep an eye on how you feel,
so that you can notice when you feel negative.
It maybe a
nasty comment from a bully, stressed out from losing your car keys, a tinge of
jealousy over a friends good fortune, an argument with someone, feeling down
because of money problems, listening to somebody’s problems, or even just your
own thoughts of doom and gloom ticking over making you feel not so good.
Whatever it is write it down.
look something like this:
So and so
said something nasty about me, I feel down.
Had a fight
with my friend, I am upset.
I have no
money, I feel stressed.
stole something from me, I am angry.
keys, I am frustrated.
So and so
has been moaning on about their problems, I feel depressed.
I could go on
all day as you can see there are endless little niggles that pop up all of the
time and most of the time we allow ourselves to feel some form of negativity,
we just do it automatically. This is what you must stop. It’s this daily
engaging in negative energy that is keeping the negative energy within you
strong. You are topping up its battery all of the time, you are constantly recharging
your ‘inner resistance’.
and your ‘inner resistance’ will start losing its power and eventually fizzle
away. It’s the strong emotional reactions like ‘outbursts of anger’ and
‘intense worrying’ that give it a powerful super charge. And your endless
repetitive negative thoughts and feelings about whatever that give it a
constant trickle charge of negativity.
If you didn’t
allow yourself to feel bad when the daily niggles are happening your ‘inner
resistance’ would weaken and your energy vibration would rise. By noticing your
thoughts, feelings and emotions you are detaching from that energy and stopping
the charge it in its tracks and this will begin to weaken the negative energy
every time you notice your mobile phone is plugged in and getting charged up,
you pull out the plug. This would mean your mobile phone battery is not getting
a full charge and would eventually run down. By writing when you feel negative
in your notebook you are in effect pulling out the plug and stopping your inner
resistance getting a charge.
this and over time you will start feeling better and better as you slowly rise
in vibration. You are releasing your ‘inner resistance’ and cleansing your
energy field and all you have to do is teach yourself to monitor your thinking.
This is the
art of being non-resistant to whatever unfolds in your life and you will have
to keep practising to master it because up until now you have reacted
automatically to whatever is unfolding and these negative reactions have become
ingrained into your instinctive behaviour patterns. Training yourself to be in
a state of non-resistance at all times is the key to breaking those instinctive
patterns and the notebook method will help you do that and this is what will
soon make any bullies disappear out of your life.
Just focus on
holding your inner peace and serenity and let things happen and if you feel a
twinge of negative energy grasping you write it down this will break its
momentum and stop your inner resistance getting a full charge. Keep this
practice up and you will soon be rising in vibration.
everything in your life will improve, you see the higher your vibration the
better everything is. You will in general be vibrating at the vibrational
levels where the better stuff is. Happiness, fun, joy, laughter, kindness,
success and love don’t exist at the lower-vibrational levels, you can only feel
or experience them when your vibration rises. So you will be happier more of
the time, you will exist where the good stuff is more of the time and you will
lift yourself up the vibrations out of the range of bullies.
be much less likely to bully you they will just feel like you are not the
person that will give them the reaction that they want and leave you alone they
will not feel drawn to you.
If you are getting
after reading this book you will have more understanding of what makes one
person bully another. You can then practice using the magic mirror method and
calm breathing when you need it and also use the notebook method to start
getting rid of your inner resistance and get your vibration up.
This will soon
have you feeling much happier and you will get less attention from bullies. It
is always good to talk to somebody if you are getting bullied as this stops you
bottling it up which only adds to your inner resistance. Bottling it up can
make you even more of a target for bullies as your vibration may drop due to
the extra negative thoughts and feelings and when your vibration has dropped
you may feel more unhappy and nervous about getting bullied.
So just follow
the techniques and bullying will soon be a thing of the past remember if you don’t react the bully
gets nothing from you.
In fact they
get their own nasty negative energy shooting back at them and they get the
horrible feelings that they were trying to give you.
If you are a bully
reading this book you recognise that you are a bully you can follow the notebook
method to help get rid of your inner resistance and this will get your
vibration up and this will stop you bullying people.
In many ways
you are also a victim because you are under siege from your inner resistance
which you have acquired through no fault of your own. Your particular life circumstances
have unfortunately left you with the burden of a strong form of inner
resistance and it’s this inner negativity that is causing all the suffering and
driving you to act in a bullying way.
It’s not your
fault that you have fallen into this negative behaviour pattern but it is up to
you to do something about it, especially now that you understand how terrible
it is for the people that you are hurting.
will feel much happier if you can leave bullying behind and your life will
improve in every way. Bullying is keeping you stuck in an unhappy place.
- Everything is energy including us
and all energy vibrates.
- The faster our energy vibrates the
better we feel and the better life is.
- Our ‘inner resistance’ is the negative
energy that we carry within and it is slow vibrating energy.
- Our early year’s experiences are
the major factor in determining the amount of ‘inner resistance’ that we carry.
- Inner resistance is what causes
some people to become bullies.
- Inner resistance can also cause
you to attract bullies because it holds you down in vibration. The higher
your vibration is the less chance there is of a bully trying to bully you.
- To raise your vibration and
dramatically change your life for the better leaving bullies behind once
and for all or to stop yourself from being a bully you have to release your
‘inner resistance’, to do this you must train yourself to embody a state
of non-resistance when everyday negative events unfold.
- The notebook method and the magic
mirror will help you to train yourself to hold a state of non-resistance
and stop you recharging your ‘inner
- Always remember bullies are the
people with the problem not you.
ADT Healthcare offers a free hotline dedicated to assisting women and families suffering from drug, alcohol and mental health problems. ADT Healthcare was founded in 2011 by people who overcame drug and alcohol addiction themselves.
Bullying Helpline: 0845 22 55 787 ww.nationalbullyinghelpline.co.uk
ACAS - Advisory, Conciliation
and Arbitration Service
Helpline: 0300 123 1100
Bullying and harassment at work- Guidance for employees: acas.org.uk
Everyone should be treated with dignity and respect
at work. Bullying and harassment of any kind are in no-one's interest and
should not be tolerated in the workplace, but if you are being bullied or
harassed it can be difficult to know what to do about it. This leaflet gives
employees basic information about bullying and harassment, summarises the
responsibilities of employers and outlines some of the options open to you and
points you to sources of further information and advice.
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easy read with powerful insights into the workings of the human mind, made easier
to understand with plenty of illustrations. It embodies a simple approach to
self-development and a great introduction for anybody stepping onto the
self-help pathway of inner change.
explains in a very understandable way, how your mind works and what you can do
with that information to change your life for the better. It provides not only
a gentle introduction to self-help but also much more, offering real insights
and positive methods for change. It will be a valuable addition to anybody’s